TILT # 1: Not afraid. Not alone.

This past summer of 2019, I felt the unmistakable push to start writing or blogging again. The calling was undeniable as I sat with my first graduate-level writing assignment. It was about visioning, calling forth the future so to speak as I named my hopes and dreams.

I obeyed the “call” and started this blog page. This blog is meant to be a collection of thoughts and lessons I have learned for the day that I can record for my children and future generations. Hence the name of the blog – TILT – This I Learned Today. Incidentally, TILT entries are part of weekly Journal-writing homework I assign my students. Yes, I am a teacher by day.

Setting up this blog page was immediately followed by weeks and weeks of the familiar pattern of falling into paralysis, being controlled by perfectionism and self-doubt. If I write, will anybody read? If I am honest, will I lose my friends? If I share my passion, will people laugh? If I publish the post, will it bless or hurt my circle? Will my photos be spectacular enough? Or my epiphanies wise enough? Do you see my conundrum?

Well, I made a commitment to publish this first blogpost before or on my birthday this year by actually naming this in my action plan in my second assignment for the same professor. Yes. Desperate times call for desperate measures. Besides, I have been listening to Mark Batterson’s book, The Circle Maker (2011) for weeks now in my car and I heard chapter 7 again today:

“Too many authors worry about whether or not their book will get published. That isn’t the question. The question is this: Are you called to write? That’s the only question you need to answer. And if the answer is yes, then you need to write the book as an act of obedience. It doesn’t matter whether anyone reads it or not.” (P.77)

And so, as an “act of obedience”, here is my first TILT blog post for my kids, “Sketch” and “Camo” (their summer camp names).

Kids, do NOT be afraid of what you do not know. When you realize you are at an impasse or a crossroad or a slump, first of all, have the courage to acknowledge it. There is NO SHAME in naming your nemesis. It could be fear. It could be confusion. It could be pride. It could be anything. In fact, as soon as you name that which challenges you, you strip it of its power over you. Nobody can use it against you. You’ve already acknowledged it.

Secondly, reach out for help. You just can’t do this life journey alone. Somebody out there, within your circle, is most likely equipped to help you walk through your current chapter. I believe that every person you encounter is there to bless you or be blessed by you. Be brave and reach out. Your tribe, your clan, your gang, your family…they’re out there and they have been put in place for you, for your changing seasons of life. Open your eyes, your ears, your heart, your spirit. They are there. You will find them.

If all else fails and you cannot see anybody to count on, call me. I will always be your mom and you are always welcome home.

We are not alone.